5 Things You Need in Order to be a Real Adult

January 20, 2012

This is a passive-aggressive blog post for all of the boys I’ve dated or friends I’ve had who don’t know what their home needs in order to be a functioning adult. Now, I’m not perfect, and I don’t claim to set any standards, but here are 5 things that you need to have in order to be a real adult:

1) A guest hand towel
No, boys, I don’t want to dry my hands on the towel you’ve been using to wipe down you body for the past two weeks. Get a hand towel. They sell them right there next to the regular towels. They’re cheap and easy to throw in the laundry. Get some.

2) Wine glasses
At one time or another, someone will bring over a bottle of wine. Do not pull out plastic cups from which to drink it. Even if it’s cheap wine, it’s wine. It should feel classy. They’re not expensive – just overlooked.

3) Hand soap
One time, I was at a friend’s house when a puppy pooped on my hand. I ran to the bathroom only to find, to my complete horror, that there was no soap. Nothing: not even a bar. I had to use shampoo. Buy a nice dispenser and then you can get the huge bottles once a year. Really not hard.

4) A file box
Not everything in the world is online yet. There are still papers to organize, and you need a file box for them – with real, labeled folders and everything. You’ll thank me when you get audited.

5) Wall art
And I don’t mean dorm room wall art. Band posters and IKEA prints are, in most cases, not acceptable wall art. I recommend Goodwill, thrift shops, local art walks, Etsy, or Poster Cabaret (preferably framed). You really have no excuse.

Categories: Uncategorized

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Organizational Purgatory

January 8, 2012

No, no, don’t worry – I’m still an atheist. But there is one purgatory that I do believe in: organizational purgatory. Despite my fondness for organization and cleanliness, I know that perfection just isn’t possible. Enter: purgatory. An organizational purgatory is that junk pile, junk drawer, or chair piled high with clothes that is just eternally messy (the kitchen sink, desk trays, entryway tables, etc). I think it was my high school best friend who referred to her junk pile as a “purgatory,” and I’ve thought of mine that way ever since and want to pass it on.


(image from CB2.com)

Purgatory can quickly become hellish (oh, I said it) if not kept in check. For instance, there is a section of my counter that is designated as paper/small object purgatory. This is where I keep things like mail that needs a response, receipts, and, currently, a shirt that needs a button repaired. If the mail goes unanswered or the receipts gather too heavily, then the system fails. But since this spot is highly conspicuous and in a place I spend a lot of time (yeah, the kitchen), items steadily stream in and out.

I also have a clothing purgatory because sometimes, ugh, it really is too hard to hang up that shirt when you get home. Clothing purgatory should never be a bed, a floor, or a sofa. Mine is a small stool that can’t have more than about 7 items on it without the pile toppling over. That way, even the shirts that I haven’t worn in a year will still get put in their proper place. I also have a bag that contains items I want to donate/sell, which I take care of based on how full it is. The annoyance of its obtrusion in my space is a great driver for me to make the trip to Goodwill.

So here’s the rules for managing your purgatory:

1) The area must be small (one drawer, one basket, one side of the desk, etc).
2) If an item doesn’t have a place in your home, make one. Don’t leave it in purgatory.
3) Keep the purgatory visible (under the bed will not work).
4) Make use of storage accessories to keep the area from just looking like a messy pile of crap.
5) Most importantly, you must tend to the items constantly – no less than once a month and maybe even daily.

Categories: Cleaning

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RIP Hitchens

December 20, 2011

Being revealed as an Atheist in Texas at age 9 during recess wasn’t easy. It was actually shocking to me to discover that I was the only one and alarming to me to see the reactions of my classmates: sheer disbelief – for a change (zing!). In middle school, a few classmates tried to bully me about it by calling me a Satan worshipper. In high school, many friends tried to help me “see the light” by giving me books and lectures. This was also when a few of my classmates, generally the oddballs, would approach me and whisper, “me too.” By the time I went to college in Austin, everyone was an Atheist. Nowadays, my friends are all over the board, but we don’t talk about religion very often. It’s mostly a non-issue. Being in the public sector, however, is a whole different story. Christopher Hitchens embraced public Atheism and went head-to-head with some fierce believers, armed with facts and wit.

Christopher Hitchens

I was never really a huge fan of Hitchens as a writer, but for his efforts in educating the world about the dark side of religion and about what it means to not believe, I must pay tribute. Rest in peace, Hitchens.

“Religion comes from the period of human prehistory where nobody—not even the mighty Democritus who concluded that all matter was made from atoms—had the smallest idea what was going on. It comes from the bawling and fearful infancy of our species, and is a babyish attempt to meet our inescapable demand for knowledge (as well as for comfort, reassurance, and other infantile needs). Today the least educated of my children knows much more about the natural order than any of the founders of religion.”

Categories: Life

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Intuition

December 18, 2011

Lately, I’ve been trying to leave a lot more of my life to my intuition. Doing this, at first, seemed to be almost contrary to my otherwise existential ways, but – au contraire – intuition, as a function of the emotional brain, is purely scientific. I just finished reading Jonah Lehrer’s “How We Decide,” and it reinforced the idea that our emotional brains, our feelings, are actually pretty smart. The book references many studies that show how much faster and better certain subconscious areas of our brain process our environment. As the Queen of Indecision™, I have been trying to listen to my gut a bit more. It has surely helped out with Christmas shopping. I’ve put thought into my gifts but refrained from the endless searching and doubting that usually comes with trying to find the perfect gifts for my loved ones. If this concept interests you at all, I highly recommend that you read Lehrer’s book. It’s very easily digestible for any non-scientific type.

decisions

(http://spamusement.com/)

So my 2012 New Year’s resolution will be simply to trust my intuition more often, from decisions at the supermarket to personal relationships. I hope that it can take some of the daily mental stress out of my life and leave my brain open to more important thoughts – like puppies.

Categories: Books, Life

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26 Before 26 Wrap-up

November 28, 2011

Well, it’s happened: I turned 26, and the world did not end. And, as you could have expected, I failed to complete my “26 before 26″ list (Inbox 0? Who can do that anyway?). All in all, the past year brought a lot more than these 26 small goals, and I don’t have many regrets.

Disneyland birthday

If my trip to Disneyland was any predictor, 26 is sure to be a great year. But without further ado, here is the final status of my list. The ones in bold are the ones I still want to do (maybe a “12 before 2012″ list?).

1) Visit San Francisco
2) Launch new personal site (I think the redesigned blog counts)
3) Organize file box
4) Write an article for a blog or newspaper
5) Take a guitar lesson
6) Complete a new painting
7) Learn to cook 3 new dinners
8) Run an 8-minute mile (Realized I hate running and gave this one up.)
9) Buy a new TV stand
10) Get new artwork for living room
11) Get car professionally cleaned
12) Print new photos of friends/family for frames
13) Learn how to bind a book (Lost interest)
14) Get a new Twitter avatar
15) Learn how to wear eyeshadow (Doesn’t mean I’m going to do it though)
16) Finish a a 5.10+ climb at the rock gym
17) Clean out GMail Inbox (Ha.)
18) Organize and arrange bookshelf
19) Get cavities filled (ew)
20) Organize/back-up files from dying Macbook
21) See the Grand Canyon
22) Speak in front of an audience (It’s not really what I had in mind, but a few presentations at work counts, right?)
23) Digitize old photos
24) Get a pedicure (Thanks, Mom)
25) Repair vintage purse
26) Get new chairs for dining room table (In the process of reupholstering now)

Categories: Life

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